dclarion: (Default)
[personal profile] dclarion
I want you to feel happy.  I want you to be respected.  I want you to feel the devotion of another.

I want, I want, I want.  This isn't about me, this is about you.  For the love of St. Gulik, what is it with all of this "I want"?

Date: 2012-04-25 09:37 pm (UTC)
redbird: closeup of me drinking tea (Default)
From: [personal profile] redbird
Partly I think that's psychology, and maybe partly the language and phrasing we're used to. You could try to make it more abstract, "you should be happy" or "in a proper universe, you will be respected," but it's still your desire or opinion. (And "you should be happy" has the failure mode of the person thinking they've done something wrong if they aren't happy.) I don't think there's a natural way, in English, to talk about how you feel about another person, what you want for them or want to give them, without saying "I."

Are you at a point where you could put this in terms of verbs other than "want" or intentions? "I will do things that make you happy" or "I will not interfere with your happiness" (or "I will do $specific_thing that I know makes you happy"). "I will always respect you" is good, but it sounds as though you're looking at how other people treat her, too. "I offer you my devotion."

Date: 2012-04-26 01:36 pm (UTC)
cornwall_calling: (Kitty)
From: [personal profile] cornwall_calling
The wanting in this case is not selfish and shows how much you care for someone because all the "wantings" are for her and not yourself.

Date: 2012-04-27 06:19 am (UTC)
moropus: kermit (Default)
From: [personal profile] moropus
Yeah, so?

Date: 2012-04-27 12:23 pm (UTC)
cornwall_calling: (Kitty)
From: [personal profile] cornwall_calling
I think that I know you well enough now to say that you are putting her wants and needs first. The fact that you would benefit from these is just a happy coincidence. Don't you think?

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